When I was 20 years old, I took off for Europe. I began my travel alone across Europe by Eurorail. This personal journey became a journey of understanding the human condition.
In my travels, I talked with people in each country I passed through.…farmers, business men and women, school teachers, reporters, wood carvers, nurses, and on it went. The life lesson I learned and have continued to develop since age 20 is that everyone wants to be loved.
Some deeply-wounded individuals may come off gruff, sarcastic, pushy, and demanding as they cry out to the world from that deep longing in their hearts. Others may whine, complain, can’t make up their minds, always seeing the negative and the impossible of new situations. Their banner is “I can’t.” Yet, I could sense a longing in their spirits of, “Please help me do it.”
Why is this? Because each person wants to be significant, even if it’s simply to their spouse, children, or neighbors. They simply want to know they count, that they are more than just a body passing through this earth. They want to know that they have made an impact on someone who truly appreciates them. They look for someone who will listen to those things that are important to them – colors, songs, projects, trips, homes, interests, sports, cars, experiences…anything! The list is varied and colored in each person’s perspective. That is what makes listening to them, so intriguing.
As I listen to people in one-on-one sessions, I can literally see them begin to sit up with more energy and enthusiasm. It’s like watching the embers of a fire lick at the new dry wood laid carefully so as not to suffocate it (to listen takes patience and skill) as I let the air of my interest feed the tiny embers. They begin to eat the new fuel of my leaning in and grow the spark into flames of desire and lifelines. Then comes the tipping point where they burst into flames of a newly sparked passion, and a bonfire roars with a voice they have so seldom, if ever, heard from themselves. All they are – fully available!
How does this happen? Let’s ponder this question. Why did the embers burst into a bonfire of passion?
It’s because another human being took time (a most precious gift) and gave it to them by fully engaging in who they are. No stop watches. No stories bigger than theirs. No changing topics. Just being fully there with them at the birth of their dreams – acknowledging that they are alive, fully appreciated and have value to give by being who they are.
This is a basic desire of each human being…to BE fully appreciated. This is my passion….to bring people to that place of BEing.